My prescriber wanted me to begin at the lowest dose and she was right

A break does not undo what you learned. That was the thing I most needed to hear and the thing I least believed at the time.

I restarted at a lower step than I stopped at, on purpose, and stayed there for six months. Slowly was the correct speed for a second attempt in my case.

The conversation I dreaded took under five minutes and contained no judgement of any kind. I had spent a month rehearsing for it.

Coming back a year into my restart to say it held, it was ordinary, and the break in the middle is now just a gap in my notes rather than a fault line.

Restarting is an ordinary shape. I did not believe that when I was doing it and I believe it completely now, having watched about thirty people here do the same.

Saying it out loud helps other people say it too. Thank you.

Nobody in this circle has ever asked me why I stopped in a tone that required an answer. That is the whole reason I was able to come back and say I had.

I started again from the bottom step, deliberately, even though I had been much further along before. It was the right call and my prescriber agreed without me having to argue.

The shame was the worst of it for me, and the shame was also the least justified part. Nothing about a break requires an apology.

My break was nine months and my restart was uneventful, which is the least dramatic sentence in this thread and the one I most wanted to read when I was deciding.

Nothing to add except that I am glad this thread exists.

What I got wrong the first time was doing it alone. The restart had a circle, a buddy and a proper conversation attached, and it went completely differently.

Something worth knowing: my second start had different side effects from my first. Not worse, different. I had expected an exact repeat and got a variation.

Agreed, and I have nothing to add to it.