What happened when I named this in therapy — putting it in its own thread so it does not get lost in the check-in.
This is a difficult one to write and I have deleted it twice.
This is the third time I have started this post and the first time I have got to the end of it, so I am going to press the button before I lose my nerve.
Not asking anyone to fix this. Mostly saying it out loud somewhere it will be read kindly, which I have not managed anywhere else.
Thanks. Saying it here first has made the idea of saying it to somebody else considerably less impossible.
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