What being challenged in this circle was like from the inside

What has helped is that nobody here treats appetite as a moral matter. That absence is doing a lot of work and I do not think it is accidental.

The facilitators in this circle have training in this specifically, and I checked that before I posted, and I am glad it was easy to find out.

This is why I read the boring weeks. Thank you for the boring weeks.

Orlaith — yes, and the bit that took me longest to accept was the next part.

My treatment team were involved from before I started, which I would say is the single most important thing in my whole account.

The thing I would say to anybody arriving is that you are allowed to be here and to be uncertain about being here.

I have found the structure of this circle protective. The agreements are not decoration and I have watched them being held.

Recovery-aware does not mean fragile, and I appreciated that being said plainly on the front of this circle before I ever posted in it.

I have found it useful to write about how I am rather than what I have done. The distinction is small and it changes what I notice.

Reading Pádraig, I recognised more of that than I expected to.

What helped was being asked how I was doing rather than how it was going. Two different questions and only one of them was about me.

Somebody here said that recovery is not a straight line and nobody in this circle expects it to be, and I read that on a very bad evening.

The absence of comparison in this circle is the reason I stayed. Everywhere else I found, people were measuring themselves against each other.

Sitting with you on this one.

I keep in regular contact with my team and I tell them what I am reading and where. That transparency has kept me safe more than once.

I have been challenged here once, gently, in a way I did not enjoy and needed. Nobody piled on. One person said one thing and then supported me.

I came here because everywhere else assumed a relationship with eating that I do not have, and the assumptions themselves were difficult.

What I needed was people who understood why certain kinds of conversation are hard, without me having to explain it every time.

Somebody noticed something in what I had written, said so once, kindly, and then stayed. That is the best thing anybody has done for me here.

Something I have had to be careful about is how much time I spend reading. There is a version of research that is not research and I know mine.